Brendan’s Story

“When Brendan was born he was beautiful but he had a big head. The doctors did a lot of testing but concluded that we must have a lot of big heads in our family. By the time he was eighteen months old he was behind on all his developmental milestones and it was clear that he was delayed. He was so sweet and loveable but he wasn’t progressing according to the normal timetable. We got him involved in early intervention and the doctors recommended a wait and see approach, so I was surprised when he was ready to enter kindergarten and they recommended a totally separate special needs classroom.

Right from the beginning school was a nightmare for Brendan. The other kids teased and made fun of him, even in a special needs classroom. He didn’t have any friends. They called him names. It made me so furious. I felt helpless. There was nothing I could do to protect him.

When Brendan came to the Ivy Street School was the first time he really felt safe. No one made fun of him. He didn’t have to feel ashamed. Everyone accepted him for who he was, and he progressed. I’ll never forget the day he called me as he was walking to Trader Joe’s by himself for the first time. I was so proud of him, and so happy for that independence.

As an adult he’s really blossomed. He has a job washing dishes at Matilda’s, a coffee shop in Watertown. They love him there. He works there five days a week and volunteers walking dogs at the MSPCA. He met a girl at the MSPCA who he likes, but was too nervous to talk to for a long time. He recently broke the ice with a conversation about Harry Potter. He blushes when he talks about her. He lives in a group home in Brookline with four other guys his age. He knew a couple of them from Ivy Street. In a few years we hope he’ll be able to move towards having more independence. He spends a lot of his free time reading. He loves Stephen King, the scarier the better. He loves walking to the Chinese restaurant near his house and grabbing dinner. He loves watching movies with the family and going tubing in the summer.

I love that he has a real life like everyone else. It’s so important that he’s been treated with respect and given choices about the life he wants for himself. He’s a contributing member of society and has relationships with people that make him happy. That’s all I want: for him to be happy.

At Ivy Street Brendan did a stand-up comedy routine in the talent show. He was amazing, so comfortable in his own skin. I asked him how he learned to do it. He said “Sometimes I study other comedians. Maybe I’m just gifted.”

Based on an interview with Brendan and his mother, Toni. Brendan lives with four other guys in their twenties in Brookline.